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Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Restaurant Bathrooms

Going out to eat at great restaurants can be fun, but I hate the challenge of the bathrooms. No, not using them – finding out which one to go into.

I’m in a great Sushi joint in New York and after a few beers, nature suddenly calls.

I walk into the bathroom area where there are 2 different doors.   Given the recently popular unisex bathrooms, I think this might be the case here.  However there are 2 different symbols on the doors so I know one has to be the “Mens” and one the “Womans”

But which one is which?

One door has a symbol that looks like a woodchuck fucking a vacuum and the other one looks like a cross between a hummingbird and a spider. What the fuck?

I wait to see if anyone comes out.  No luck. Then I hang around to see if anyone else can figure this shit out.  No luck. Now I really have to go after downing 3 beers.

I slowly open one door to check if there are urinals.  Nope.

I check the other one, and…. success!  All this trauma to take a simple pee break.

So an open Memo to all restaurant owners: 

Put a simple fucking “M” or “W” on the door, or give us the clever play on words if you have an ethnic or themed joint (you know, “Lads/Lasses”, “Kings/Queens”, etc.) so we can quickly go in and get our business done.

Don’t make us sit there wetting our pants while we try to figure out your shitty artwork/symbolism on the bathroom door.

Dickwads.


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